Friday, 20 November 2009

unaccustomed as I am to suffering

It seems that the reason I have been quiet here is not that a bunch of doctors gave me food poisoning, being doctors they tested everything didn't they?, no it was "just" a case of norovirus, aka winter vomiting virus. Seventeen of us got it, non died, though it does that quite often!

So my road test of this virus, what does it do and is it a good idea to avoid it or not? If you can't afford colon hydrotherapy and do not mind the horror of bringing up your lunch from as far down as your knees then this is the way for you to clean out that gastric tract and start again. You will fell queasy for days after which will save even more money on the cost of meals and probably help you drop a pound or so in weight. the down side is that you will lack energy, ache all over and find it difficult to sleep but be too exhausted to utilise the extra waking hours. You will have to be scrupulously clean to avoid passing on this highly contagious bug or suffer the scorn and hatred of friends and family.

So for efficiency in causing pain and suffering I award this bug *****

As a good excuse for a few days off work I am afraid I cannot award any.

Got that on saturday at a party with enough doctors to staff a small hospital so I guess a small hospital has been without staff this week! at least I queue jumped and asked a consultant I knew about a red lump which had just appeared and did not seem to be responding to treatment, his diagnosis- ooooooH that's nasty, it will probably swell up and explode! while distracted with something else that is exactly what it did, so much for inert lumps. Egyptians had seven plagues i seem to remember so only five to go.

One good moment this week when the health clinic nurse pulled out the stitches from last week's wee lump removal she saw me off with " there you go pet " which is not the sort of endearment I used to get and cheered me no end.
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4 comments:

  1. You allways put a big smile on my face reading your blogs.
    You have a fab sence of humour.
    Glad you are starting to feel better.
    So what are you going to do with the money saved?
    x

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  2. It seems that I'm not the only one who adores you. I completely agree with Lisa, Caroline. I love reading your blogs, too! They never fail to bring a smile to my face.

    Melissa XX

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  3. I'll third that. It's a pity you had to suffer so much to provide us with an entertaining post. I suppose that the Doctors brought their germs in from their small hospital.

    Enjoy your newly found health!

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  4. I hope you're feeling better by now, Caroline.

    An amusing post, nevertheless, and I'm glad I wasn't reading it over breakfast...

    Calie xxx

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Many thanks to all who ever joined in the conversation and to those who took the time to follow my zig zag to a new life..

I can be contacted on the email found on my profile page.